what God’s perfect timing really means

when your perfect timing is not His perfect timing

One day I was reading my emails in the office when I happen to see the monthly email the corporate recruitment is sending for job openings across all sites. I saw the same position I have now in the site I was considering transferring to two years ago. The only time I was seriously looking for a lateral transfer was in January 2015 when everything that had happened for the past 16 months never crossed my mind. Well, it did though I wasn’t giving it much thought because I didn’t think of it as a possibility. Then again we all know how fate could be funny and mean at the same time, right?

As what I was saying, I wanted to move to Baguio early of 2015 for reasons my closest friends and my readers from Off the Wall knows. I was physically and emotionally drained living in the busy, crazy, fast paced life in Metro Manila for seven years. I was waiting for the right time to move somewhere else, away from the life I built here in the city. That time I wanted so much to just pack my bags and leave but for some reason, I always held back. I would talk myself out of the crazy idea of leaving a secure job and would have a thousand and one reasons of why I should not make hasty decisions. Maybe it’s not what God had intended to happen yet. Maybe in God’s perfect timing, it will.

It never happened. A bunch of things did happen but not the one I was hoping for.

Someone told me, “God sometimes give you what you really need than what you think you need. You may not see the wisdom of it now. Believe me, later on you would.” A friend also said when I mentioned the job opening to her that it wasn’t meant to be.

Seeing that email after everything had changed made me think of what God’s perfect timing really means. He knew that I would jump at the opportunity if I saw this before without thinking of the repercussions of my abrupt decision. At the back of my mind I knew that my wanting of moving away was a result of my cowardice. I was running away from things I don’t want to face back then.

Continue reading “what God’s perfect timing really means”

with love, –A.

life and my love for writing

As I’ve mentioned in Off the Wall, I’m taking a break from writing and I wouldn’t be using Off the Wall anymore when I get back. After months of my self-imposed semi-online hiatus, I feel like I’m ready to go back to the online world—though not very much.

I wasn’t really totally gone from the net. I’d been a lurker in various social media sites. I know what’s going on around me, whatever viral post is up there, new movies, new books, current events. I wasn’t a total hermit. I still have the occasional Facebook status update, tweets and Instagram post. I just don’t have the energy to engage with anyone online. I was, in some way, offline most of the time. Reachable but unresponsive.

What changed then? A little of everything.

For the past months my sole focus is to put my life back together. I was juggling work, house chores, financial plans, baby and all sorts of domestic stuff, and motherhood all at the same time. It was chaotic for the first few weeks and I thought I won’t get my footing with where my life was at that time.

Continue reading “with love, –A.”