life doesn’t start when heartaches end

you wade through it
even if it hurt
you move on
you wake up every day
go through the motions each day
you eat
laugh with friends
cry in the corner
and then laugh some more
no matter how crappy you feel
or how crazy you think
you are alive
you might think it doesn’t seem much
but you’re still breathing
you have a life
just with a broken heart
it feels different
like something is missing
like there is a gaping hole where your heart once was
but deep inside you know it’s an excuse
because even if you don’t accept it now
at the end of the day
you know that life
doesn’t start when heartaches end
it just goes on

with love, –A.

life and my love for writing

As I’ve mentioned in Off the Wall, I’m taking a break from writing and I wouldn’t be using Off the Wall anymore when I get back. After months of my self-imposed semi-online hiatus, I feel like I’m ready to go back to the online world—though not very much.

I wasn’t really totally gone from the net. I’d been a lurker in various social media sites. I know what’s going on around me, whatever viral post is up there, new movies, new books, current events. I wasn’t a total hermit. I still have the occasional Facebook status update, tweets and Instagram post. I just don’t have the energy to engage with anyone online. I was, in some way, offline most of the time. Reachable but unresponsive.

What changed then? A little of everything.

For the past months my sole focus is to put my life back together. I was juggling work, house chores, financial plans, baby and all sorts of domestic stuff, and motherhood all at the same time. It was chaotic for the first few weeks and I thought I won’t get my footing with where my life was at that time.

Continue reading “with love, –A.”